Welcome to Romance

I am a contemporary romance writer. I published my first novel, Take 2, in Dec 2012. I chat about relationships and love. I'm no expert! I'd love your feedback!

Monday, October 29, 2012

To Fall In Love

Does everyone want to be in love? What about marriage? Does everyone want to be married?

I look back to my dating days in my early twenties. Yes, love and marriage were very important to me, to all of my girlfriends. I remember how dating went (yes, it was a long time ago but I do still remember): we'd meet, go on a date or two or three, I wanted a relationship, he didn't.  I have surveyed friends from back then and they remember it similarly.  Most of the guys were not that interested in having a monogamous relationship or ready to get married. 

Flip the calendar twenty-five to thirty years in the future. Same friends surveyed...men are more interested in a monogamous relationship and marriage than women around the same age. Why is that? Why the switch? I have a theory.

When men are twenty the world is their oyster: they are young, have all the vim and vigor (yes, I said vim and vigor) and they know they are studs. Women, on the other hand, are looking for safety and security for their future, marriage being the answer. But when women reach their mid-forties, they have careers, learned they can support themselves and live independently. Men, on the other hand, seem to begin to want the safety and security of not living alone in their later years. 

I'm not saying any of this is wrong, its just interesting and totally explains why young women marry older men and why cougar women date young men. Obviously, we have all known couples that married young and grew old together.  I don't mean to imply this to "all" men or women, but I have noticed it quite a bit.  Look back at your younger dating years.  What do you remember? What about now? Are you single or have single friends? Are you looking for love?

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